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I close my eyes, push my soft lips against his and squeezehis hand. He tastes of wine and smells of leathery cologne. The kiss isslow and gentle, just like the other night -- nothing like the heat andurgency of Shayna. This is a grown-up kiss. This kiss has insurance anda pension plan and a glass of water before bed time. I like it, itfeels warm and loving and comfortable. It feels like the sort of kissEllen would like.When our lips part, we're both smiling. Wayne is also wearing some ofmy lipstick, which has transferred onto his lips at a squint angle, andI burst out laughing."Sorry about that," I say with an embarrassed giggle, biting my lip asmy face transforms into a bright grin at the confusion written overWayne's face. "My lipstick," I explain. "I guess I should have blottedit some more." I take my napkin and dip it in my water glass, using itagainst Wayne's red-stained lips, which he lets me do uncomplainingly.It's only after I've done this I think how easy this comes to me. .. I'm no stranger to hurt and pain. We will work this thing out together." Karen whispered."He sodomized me Karen! He sodomized me... !" She was close to screaming."It's all right. It's not the end of the world. I know you don't believe that now, but it's not the end of the world, honest. I know ... I've been there." Karen was attempting to keep Elisabeth from getting hysterical.Karen couldn't be sure if Elisabeth had understood her or not as Elisabeth continued. " ... and other things. Cruel. Disgusting. Degrading things." She buried her face in her hands crying uncontrollably once again.Karen now felt that she had a pretty fair idea of what had happened to Elisabeth. She didn't feel qualified or even necessarily comfortable taking on the role of psychologist, but she remembered how confused she had felt after her father had raped her the first time. If someone, anyone had been there to help snap her out of self-guilt it could have been easier.Karen pulled Elisabeth's hands away.
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